We often speak about Loving each other, Loving our family and friends, but true unconditional Love must start with yourself. We must first feel Love in order to give it to anyone or anything else. When we take time for ourselves, we are then able to give it freely to all. When was the last time you did something solely for yourself. It hopefully was recent and done in-joy. This time out to give yourself Love can be so simply, but the repercussions of this act send ripples through our world. If we are holding on to self judgment there is no way to not place it in our world, for our energy is the wave, our thoughts are the consciousness, are journey together here is not made of separate parts, but of a whole. Your own feelings, self judgments and self criticisms do not only effect you. Step one to living in harmony starts within you. What if the scenes outside of you were first all created from within you. As many have come to understand in the scientific world, our perception, which is unique within each of us, is how we process our point of view, it is how we understand our world and our place within it.
What if we practiced non-judgment of self. In the beginning of pondering this thought, many years ago, I found myself anxious. "If I don't judge myself, how will I know how to behave?" and "How will others perceive me" Feelings of a need to control, masked as fear. Over the years I have developed some techniques to quieting self judgement. But step one was deciding I was worth it! There is freedom in learning these techniques or creating some of your own, as it allows space, in your energy, in your mind, and in your heart. When we become less harsh with ourselves, it becomes easier to be less harsh with others. There is a natural flow of peace the awakens within you. Below are some simple techniques I have used over the years, take any that feel good to you and decide you are worth it, after all that is the honest truth, you are always worth it.
Mirror Exercise: This idea actually was not mine, I was first introduced to it by Louise Hay in her movie "You can heal your life". It was also an important lesson shown in the movie "What the Bleep do we know". It is one of my favorite, daily activities. This is easy to add into your day, as most of us see our reflection many times through out the day, not just in our bathroom mirror. So when you come in contact with your reflection, rather then stand in judgment of what you see, refocus. It is important that you find something, anything that you truly love about your reflection. Maybe your eyes, or your freckles anything at all. Start with that each time you see yourself, focus first on the little things you love. As you get ready for your day take time to appreciate your reflection in as many ways as you can. In the beginning if you find it difficult don't give up, it becomes very easy with time. If you can't pinpoint something you really love simple tell yourself "I Love you" something will emerge just from those simple words.
Stop the chatter: When you are in your car or washing the dishes you find your mind is running with idea's, thoughts and to do lists. There is one other thing our minds tend to do, look back on situations, and start judging what we said, how we dressed, what "they" thought. Nothing useful comes from these habits of evaluating old situations, but it can break our good mood. So the next time your in one of these mind frames, as soon as you take notice, hum a note, think of something fun you recently did, or even go back to your to do list. These times of self judgment will take a back seat as soon as you start turning them off when they turn on. Again this takes time and patience, but your worth the effort!
Visualization: This is a wonderful way to focus on what you DO want, take time each day to spend time thinking about what you like about yourself, and expand that to an image. Maybe your in a crowd and all eyes are on you because you are a delight to chat with, or you make everyone laugh. Pehaps your in a crowd and everyone passes you by because your ready to relax and be alone. Maybe your at the beach in a two piece and feeling great about it, or perhaps your short hair has grown long and your freckles have seemingly disappeared. Whatever image you hold, hold it feeling great, excited for the changes and ready to start acting like you already have it. Ask yourself what could I do today that gets me on my way to this wonderful image. Whatever answers you receive follow through with them!
Take the time to shut off self-judgment as you do, you will find it easier and easier to not judge everyone else, be kind to yourself, give yourself the attention you deserve, and the rest of what you desire will fall into place! This is not a complete list of exercises but a few to get your mind rolling, there are hundreds of ways to give yourself love, and the sooner you stop judging how you do this the easier it will be!
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